In Case of Emergency

Well, yesterday I wrote about how the defensive walls around my heart had crumbled. Well, as yesterday progressed I remembered all of the other times in the last two–nearly three–months that I nearly let that happen and how, if I had, I would have been miserable after some ensuing event. So, though perhaps half-heartedly, I have started to build them up again while I wait to see how things turn out.

And since that magical Wednesday night this is what’s happened: yesterday around lunchtime I sent JetBlue a text message, just to check on how she was doing. And I heard back from her pretty much right away. Good stuff. And last night I called her to follow up on her perhaps somewhat open-ended “we’ll go out” and I got her machine. And, to this point, still no response. But that’s cool. I’ve learned from past phone calls that the response–positive or negative–will come when it comes and there’s absolutely no use in worrying about when that will be. So I’m not.

So, basically, nothing has changed since Wednesday night. I have no reason to believe that there have been any good or bad signs for what the future might hold. And that’s fine. My heart is resting comfortably in its newly rebuilt protective wall. Only now the walls are a bit thinner than before. Oh, and I’ve installed a button on the wall that allows me to immediately tear it down if need be. Sort of a “In Case of Emergency Open Your Heart to the Girl Right Now” button.

And, for tonight, I’m not sure what the evening holds for me. Some peeps from work are going downtown. Alternatively, A., also from work, suggested the 5:30 drinkfest at PCB. I’m certainly considering going to my usual haunts for the Red Sox-Yankees at 7. I just can’t get my hopes up that it will be anything like last Friday’s debauch.

So, anyway, that’s it for now. You may have to wait until Monday to find out where the next few hours take me…


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