So, anyway, dear readers I went down to the secret bar on Wednesday with Tattoo Guy. It’s the first time he’s been out in a while and seemed to be in rare form. I always forget to ask him that all important question before I tell him I’m going out–you know, have you been drinking all day already?

At any rate, the night was going fine despite his boisterousness. Ms. Hold ‘Em came down around ten o’clock so we got to hang out awhile. She’s in her busy season with work (okay, okay, selling stuff on the Internet) so it was a real bonus as far as I was concerned. At any rate, I’ve started to notice–and I’m not sure if I’ve mentioned this before–that when she’s not drunk she’s pretty shy. Either that or she saw me after I’d had a couple of drinks and said to herself “You know what? I’m all set.” (hey, until she professes her everlastin’ love for me, I’ll be filled with doubt). 

At any rate, I think all was going well until around 1:15 when Tattoo Guy decided he absolutely had to leave AND he absolutely needed to go to McDonald’s. The conversation, which I vaguely remember being in front of several people, went something like this:

TG: You need to drive me home and I need to stop at McDonalds, bitch.

Me: Ms. Hold ‘Em will be leaving soon. It can wait.

TG: No it can’t fuckin wait. Let’s go.

Me: Motherfucker, Ms. Hold ‘Em is here and she’ll be gone before I get back. Do you fucking understand that?

TG: I’m your friend motherfucker.

Me: Yeah you are so just go sleep in the car or something, dick.

TG: Fuck you bitch. She’ll still be here so let’s just motherfuckin’ go.

Me: Fuck you. I’m not leaving.

TG: Come on, you motherfuckin prick!

Me: Well, no McDonalds and I’ll see if Ms. Hold ‘Em wants to go.

TG: You’re bringing me to fucking McDonalds.

Then Ms. Hold ‘Em walked outside. I asked her if she wanted to go for a ride to drop Tattoo Guy off and at first said yes but then decided to stay to talk to a friend. So we said goodnight and I took off, being sure to send an apologetic text to her on the way.

Tattoo Guy insisted on the trip to McDonalds and then home. I was driving fast–but you know I’m not a crazy driver so not too fast. The whole way home I berated him for making me leave. Ms. Hold ‘Em sent me a text back that she understood and I was being a good friend to him–so I feel like I got some points there.

At any rate, I got back to the secret bar as she was walking out. So we said a brief goodnight and I went back in.

And yet the night wasn’t over. After the bar officially closed the bartender was waiting outside ready to go. C.–who you may recall is her boyfriend–was inside talking to someone and seemed to be in no rush to go. He knew she wanted to go, but he’s had this thing lately about ‘standing his ground.’ I don’t know.

Anyway, she asked me for a ride home and I gave her one. When we got there she said something vaguely about keys to the house, said goodnight and left. I drove away and then realized she might’ve said something about not having her keys so I tried to circle around the block to check to see if she was okay. But it was so foggy, I couldn’t even see the houses not to mention try to remember which one was hers.

So, as it turned out she was locked out. C. came home an hour later. Man, all is not well in that household. It’s a shame really, because they’re the ones who got Ms. Hold ‘Em and I together.

At any rate, that’s all I got for now. Oh, except I hung out with JetBlue a while last night at the secret bar. But that was relatively uneventful–though I will say she wasn’t being annoying. It was a refreshing change of pace.


4 Responses to “Updatable”

  1. bob-kat Says:

    Jeez, with friends like that who needs enimies! It’s amazing how much drink can change someone. Anyway, it sounds like you got bonus points for driving TG home so it’s not all bad.

    Michele sent me over to say hi.

  2. Novy Says:

    Michelle sent me over to say hi…

    I do hope all that name calling was in fun then again as bob said drinking does change people

    personally he would have walked home friend or not

  3. nosetback Says:

    Oh yeah, I should’ve noted that the liberal use of words like motherfucker is pretty typical of our conversations…

  4. Judith Says:

    Michelle sent me!

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